Why do so many guys put goo in their hair these days?This is a trend that suddenly became hip again a few years back, and now it's gotten completely out of hand. Seriously. Nine out of every ten guys you see nowadays has the exact same hairstyle: cropped short and saturated in goo. You know, "gel". "Mousse". "Styling solution". "Restructuring pomade". Whatever. It's got a billion and seven different names, and is available in twice as many different brand names in a whole range of prices, but no matter how you look at it, it's all goo.
Everywhere I go, I see these guys with crunchy, one to two-inch long, gel-encrusted hair that looks as if it's been laminated. They look like those Ken dolls with the plastic, painted-on hair.
I don't understand the appeal. To me, it's not just physically off-putting, it's also psychologically off-putting. I mean, even if the guy were really good-looking, and really cool, and miraculously interested in me, and he was sending out all the signals (whatever those are), and approached me (yeah, right), and, like, totally wanted me, the only message I'd get from him in my mind would be:
"Don't touch my hair. It's covered in goo, and it took me all morning to get it just right. If we get too hot & heavy, you will inevitably mess it up, so passionate make-out sessions and naked wrestling are out of the question. Don't touch the hair, OK?"
What fun is that?
Seriously. That's what I think. But then maybe I read to much into these things. What do you think?
You know what I need right now? Some friends. Like, as in, real-life, do-stuff-in-person-with friends. If I were to place a personal ad, it would look something like this:
"SHY, TORMENTED, BRILLIANT-YET-MISUNDERSTOOD 20-YEAR-OLD FEMALE SEEKS SMALL GROUP OF HIP ECCENTRICS FOR COFFEE AND AMUSING CONVERSATIONS. QUIRKY, OBSCURE SENSE OF HUMOUR A MUST. APPLY ALONE OR WITH SIMILARLY IDIOSYNCRATIC FRIENDS."
And to think I actually wonder why no one wants to hang out with me.
Tomorrow I think it's time to start job-hunting again. I clearly need something to do.
Goodnight.
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� Ripe Tomato 2001-2005
Don't steal my shit. I'll send thugs. Oh shut up. I do
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