OK ... this is lame. I swear. But ... well I have a cute little story. Sort of. Actually it's dumb. But, I dunno ... well here it is.Brendan was over, and we ordered Chinese for dinner. Chinese food, that is. Don't get any twisted ideas. So anyway, yeah. There we are, watching TV, eating our food, sitting on the couch ... I guess we were finishing up ... yeah, wait, I remember .. we'd finished up, cleaned shit up, put the dishes away, etc. And we sat back down in front of the TV. Brendan handed me a fortune cookie. Everyone loves fortune cookies, right? They're not particularly tasty or anything ... but come on, it's a message in a cookie! How cool is that? Incidentally .... check out Badcookie.com, where you'll read fortunes that, while most unpleasant, are far more likely to come true than the wussy feel-good ones you're used to getting. Some examples:
"If you continually give you will continually have nothing."
"You foolishly believe in the goodness of mankind."
"You are not one of the people who "goes places in life"."
And my personal favourite: "It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others."
But I digress .... so, back to my story. I broke open the damn cookie and read my fortune. Now, this is where it gets lame. Sappy. I try to avoid sappy. It's not like I think fortune cookies, or horroscopes, or anything like that, are true prophecies, or even remotely accurate. They're totally random, right? It's silly to put stock in a little piece of paper, right? But there I was, sitting beside Brendan on the couch with this fortune in my hand ... it was like a scene from a goddamn cutesy-pie lame-ass chick movie ... I read it out loud:
"Stop searching forever, happiness is just next to you."
Then I guess I sorta poked Brendan and made some mocking "awww" sound relating to the fortune. Because I'm like that.
And that's my story. I'm sure you're groaning now. But I thought it was ... I dunno. Neat. In an eye-rolling, vaguely sickening sort of way. But ... OK. It was just the right fortune at the right time. Had I been alone eating Chinese takeout that night (as I sometimes am), that fortune wouldn't have been so neat. I would've felt very gypped, as a matter of fact. But no, I was sitting next to Brendan, content, as I tend to be when he's around. And so, being the suck that I am, for a split second it sort of, like, seemed to speak to me. Or something like that. I know it's just a piece of paper. I know I could just as easily have gotten one saying something like "Vanity is your greatest weakness." Or "You communicate well with animals." I know. I know. But even so. It was cute. For a minute. OK?
Yeah.
Tomorrow I'll be in Toronto yet again. I was there twice last week. I'll probably visit Chinatown again, because Chinatown is the coolest place to shop, like, ever (once you get used to that weird smell of market fruit, fish, and dried food products -- and on garbage days, the aforementioned items rotting away in bags on the street) ... but this time I'm determined to come back with some Asian porn. Just because. I keep meaning to pick some up, but somehow I've never been able to purchase anything remotely smutty. I just can't face the cashier. In this case it'd be some old Chinese dude ... and I bet he'd wonder what a young white girl was doing buying Asian pussy magazines. Then again, it is Toronto. No one takes any notice of what might seem bizarre in most other places. Besides, what do I care? I'd have Asian porn! Go me!
Off to bed now. Because it's time. Goodnight to all.
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