Hmm ... might as well attempt to write a real entry.Some half-assed packing has been done. My mom decided to take off somewhere this afternoon and won't be back until much later tonight, and I wasn't really sure what she wanted me to pack today. Oh well, she can tell James and I what to pack tomorrow, I suppose.
Looks like I've lost a couple of pounds this past week or so. Nothing major, perhaps 2 or 3 pounds. I haven't been eating healthfully, I've just been sort of .. well, having coffee (cream, no sugar) when I wake up and then not really eating throughout the day, until supper time or later at night, then eating a meal in which I scarf down whatever I want ... all within about an hour. I used to do this last year, and gradually managed to lose about 30 pounds or so as a result. Unfortunately, I also developed a bit of an iron deficiency and probably a few other deficiencies I wasn't aware of. Not only that, but the meals I ate at night were too big. I was always full to the point of near nausea when I finished ... like I was trying to compensate for having been so hungry all day. Fortunately, I never did anything really disturbing or dangerous like purging.
Anyway, I'm not so sure I want to follow the same pattern this time. I'd rather make sure I eat my vegetables, and don't consume ridiculous amounts of food in one sitting, and I don't particularly enjoy being hungry all day. I think it would also be a really good idea for me to get some exercise. I seem to have a hard time motivating myself to do that sort of thing, though. I know James wants us to do some exercising together, and Crystal thinks I should learn to rollerblade. At least I have people who are behind me on this.
Something a bit weird is the fact that I keep reading "pro-ana" (pro anorexia) sites like this one. I am so incredibly opposed to the idea of encouraging people with eating disorders to pursue their acquired diseases. Aside from the site I just linked (which is disturbingly manipulative and deceitful about what an eating disorder really is), most of these sites don't actually promote anorexia, I've found ... what I mean is, they don't try to encourage those without eating disorders to develop them, but rather offer a support network in which fellow anorexics and/or bulimics can wallow in their driven self-hatred and denigration. Then again, now that I think of it, all the sites really have on the front page is some sort of disclaimer mentioning that the content of the page may be triggering for those trying to recover from an eating disorder, and that it's best for those without eating disorders not to develop one, and therefore certain people should not proceed to read the content of the site. It's a disclaimer, and that's all. Who would listen to it, really? Then again, I also believe in freedom of speech. I wouldn't ban those sites, and I think that for the most part, the content is badly written, the pages poorly-designed, and the supposedly "thinspirational" photographs of beyond waifer-thin models and actresses hideous. I'm not sure how much of an influence a website like that could have on a person .... I almost think some of them are joke pages. But then, you never really know what goes on in the minds of others.
Hmmm ... this seems to be leading into some sort of mega-rant, and since James will be here soon and I also have laundry to do, I think it would be best if I saved this for another day. So I will.
Bye for now.
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Ripest entries on the vine
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Busted - Tuesday, Oct. 25, 2005
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